movie review

Christmas Bounty (2013)

MICHAEL HANUS, MIKE 'THE MIZ' MIZANIN, APRIL TELEK, WILL GREENBERG, FRANCIA RAISA, ALEKS PAUNOVIC

Director:

Gil Junger

Starring:

Francia Raisa

Mike ‘The Miz’ Mizanin

Will Greenberg

Plot:

A former bounty hunter turns into an elementary schoolteacher. Determined to have a normal life and keep her bounty hunter past a secret, she reluctantly returns home for Christmas to help save the family business by catching the one bounty that got away. But when her fiancé follows her home for the holiday, she struggles to hide her wild family business and a bounty hunter ex-boyfriend she thought she’d left behind.

Review:

Wow, I’ve seen some bad Christmas movies (I normally like them) this one though is up there. Bounty hunters and Christmas are a weird combination but I think I could see how it could work. There’s just too much on top of that though. Did I mention they’re from New Jersey and fit every Jersey stereotype? How about the fact that the main character is a woman trying to escape that life but who gets sucked back in when a bounty she caught years ago gets out of jail? Her fiancé of course doesn’t know about her real life, that is until he’s kidnapped. Also, even though he was willing to accept her for who she was, she dumped him for the muscles from her past.

2/5

Transformers: Age of Extinction (2014)

Transformers Age of Extinction

Transformers: Age of Extinction (2014)

Director:

Michael Bay

Starring:

Mark Wahlberg

Nicola Peltz

Jack Reynor

Plot:

A mechanic and his family join the Autobots as they are targeted by a bounty hunter from another world.

Review:

I like that this movie shows the consequences of the previous movies. All the destruction.

Such a wonderful depiction of our American military and their reaction to something they don’t understand. I thought Michael Bay liked the military? I thought one of the reasons they let him work with their shit was because he always did such a nice depiction of them. I guess I was wrong. Maybe it’s because the head dude is actually CIA and it’s ok to depict them as evil.

At least the dude is hot in this movie. There is equal opportunity eye candy. They did kill the weird guy which pisses me off. I liked him, even though he did give them up.

This movie was a lot darker than the others, at least from what I remember of them. I wish the women were more than just a piece of ass. They always seem to be able to work with machines, but other than running they aren’t there for much but being a pretty face. Though in this one I thought she had a bit too much makeup on, just my opinion.

All Asians can kick ass evidently.

The ending was a huge joke and made a movie that wasn’t that bad stupid. Optimus Prime riding a dinosaur into battle is not cool. I also disliked the fact that Mark Wahlberg’s character started the movie as an inventor but then just ended up using an alien gun to solve problems. You would think that he could find some brainy attack, but nope just brute force it.

There is no reason for a Transformers movie to be 165 minutes long. It was like watching Return of the King, only nowhere near as good.

2/5

My face is my warrant, no joke that was said in this movie.

Space Station 76 (2014)

Space Station 76

Space Station 76 (2014)

Director:

Jack Plotnick

Starring:

Patrick Wilson

Liv Tyler

Marisa Coughlan

Plot:

A 1970s version of the future, where personalities and asteroids collide.

Review:

So I’ve never been a huge fan of the 70s. It’s not an era I can relate to so normally the movies from that time annoy me at best. After watching the trailer for this movie, though, I was intrigued enough to rent it.

Well it was as depressing as any other movie from that time that I’ve ever watched. Almost everyone was horrible and selfish and there was a stupid bullshit ending.

1/5

Blended (2014)

Blended

Blended (2014)

Director:

Frank Coraci

Starring:

Adam Sandler

Drew Barrymore

Wendi McLendon-Covey

Plot:

After a bad blind date, a man and woman find themselves stuck together at a resort for families, where their attraction grows as their respective kids benefit from the burgeoning relationship.

Review:

I laughed, I cried, it moved me.

I’m not a big Adam Sandler fan, but I like his romantic movies. This movie, in my opinion, is right up there with 50 First Dates. Yes it was a bit heavy handed in places, but I don’t care.

There was nothing truly original here and there was an over abundance of clichés, but sometimes that’s what you need. It’s nice to watch a movie that you can rely on to deliver certain tropes and not try and reinvent the wheel.

4/5

 

I Know That Voice (2013)

I Know That Voice

I Know That Voice (2013)

Director:

Lawrence Shapiro

Starring:

John DiMaggio

Kevin Conroy

Jim Cummings

Synopsis:

Several voice actors discuss their art and their careers.

Review:

Voice acting is so interesting, so when I saw this movie on Netflix I could not pass on watching it. Since I’m actually interested in the subject a lot of what they said I already knew, but it was fascinating just to hear the actors talk about their craft.

I did feel like there was some barely contained bitterness about their perception in the rest of Hollywood by some of the actors. For the most part, though, they all seemed really nice and like a family.

I liked that they included a part about voice acting in video games. That’s something I hear more and more about lately. Actors in the studio recording for the new Firefly game or Keifer Sutherland taking over the voice of Snake in the Metal Gear Solid game.

If I decided to become an actor I would totally want to do voice.

4/5