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Acts of Vengeance (2017)

Acts of Vengeance (2017)

Director:

Isaac Florentine

Starring:

Antonio Banderas

Christina Serafini

Karl Urban

Atanas Srebrev

Plot:

A fast-talking lawyer transforms his body and takes a vow of silence, not to be broken until he finds out who killed his wife and daughter and has his revenge.

Review:

I watched this movie, then literally completely forgot I had. It’s been an effort to remember enough to write this review.

Antonio Banderas character is a hot shot lawyer that talks his clients problems away. He’s a criminal defense attorney, something that pays well if you’re good and is required, but also comes with the price of knowing that you’re potentially getting bad guys back on the street. As long as the money is coming in he doesn’t care, but when his wife and child are murdered things change.

Karl Urban was jacked in this movie and I kept hoping for more, sadly I did not like his character and felt like he was wasted.

The action was alright, but this was not an action movie despite what the trailer seems to say. Yet another misleading trailer.

The idea is unoriginal, the acting is fine, the payoff is eh. Would not recommend.

2/5

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Friendly’s Celebration Ice Cream Cake ice cream

So this is a weird little letter I wrote to Friendly’s the other day after getting over a migraine. For whatever reason the entire time I was in pain I was thinking about this ice cream, so I decided to write them and get my feelings out there. It’s kind of embarrassing, so I figured why not share it on my blog lol

Here it is in all of its glory:

The first time I bought Friendly’s Celebration Ice Cream Cake I had no idea what I was getting myself into. I bought it because my husband likes to try limited flavors and loves ice cream cake. Little did I know that I would never be the same.

I had a bowl because I’m rarely picky when it comes to ice cream and it wound up being really good. My husband eats ice cream like it will go bad within hours of it being opened so all I had from that first carton was a normal sized bowl just slightly bigger than recommended serving size. Really, who actually eats the recommended size?

The next time I was at the grocery store I saw that Breyers had their own ice cream cake flavor so I bought it. My reasoning was that it wasn’t limited and surely it was as good as yours. It was not. Not even close. My husband was actually annoyed at me for getting the wrong kind.

The next trip to the grocery store there were only three cartons of Friendly’s Celebration Ice Cream Cake ice cream. Just three. It was a horrible reminder that this flavor was limited so I bought them all. I had my husband stop at another grocery store and get their stock, there were two. The next day I went to the only other grocery store within a reasonable distance of us selling Friendly’s and I bought out their supply too, all three cartons of it. Thank goodness we have a deep freezer.

Each time I went to the grocery story I would check their supply and buy whatever I could. One time they had seven cartons and I only bought three. I regret that now.

I realize how crazy this makes me sound. Honestly who drives to multiple different grocery stores for a flavor of ice cream? I’ve never done that in my life. The only person I revealed my secret to was my mother and she laughed. She also assumed that I would never run out. Maybe if I’d done the smart thing and rationed my supply, but I didn’t. I couldn’t. My normal, reasonable size bowls were not enough for this flavor. I had bowls that were glorious in size, bowls that even my husband looked at in surprise. I didn’t care. I gained four pounds just from this ice cream and I know the only reason it wasn’t more was because I was breastfeeding. What’s four pounds when you’re eating the ice cream of the gods?

My husband let me have the last bowl because he’s awesome like that. It was bittersweet. I knew it was going to be my last because we hadn’t seen any at any of the stores in a few weeks. I even drove out of my way to a Wal-Mart that your website said had it, they don’t sell your brand, you might want to fix that.

I’ve never loved a flavor of ice cream on this level before. You’d think after the many cartons I ate that I’d be tired of it, I’m pretty sure my husband was there at the end, but not me. He has since moved on, going back to old favorites. I have not. I can’t. Any time I’m in the ice cream aisle of a grocery store it’s because I’m hoping against hope that I will see Friendly’s Celebration Ice Cream Cake ice cream just sitting there waiting for me. It never is.

Feeling sorry for me my husband one day recently brought home cookie dough ice cream that I used to love, I had a bowl and was disappointed. Ice cream just isn’t the same anymore.

I’m writing this to you in the hopes that you’ll tell me you’re bringing it back. That you can give me a date when it will be on the store shelves again. Or that you’ll allow me to buy it directly from you. Or that you’ve found my sad letter depressing enough to provide me with a lifetime supply of my favorite flavor for free. Any of these will be acceptable, but please, please don’t tell me that I will never see it again. I don’t know if I could bear it.

*****

I ended up getting the most corporate response ever back, but they ended up pointing me toward a grocery store thirty-five minutes away that had three cartons. I’m sure by the time this posts it will all be gone.

Sense 8

Recently I watched and loved the second season of Sense 8, almost as soon as I’d finished Netflix announced that it had been canceled. I felt so betrayed. It’s been some time since I heard their decision and I can safely say that I’m still pissed off. I’ve actually gone so far as to cancel Netflix. While, I’m sure I’ll be back, for the first time in about ten years I won’t have Netflix. When I do inevitably re-subscribe I don’t see myself keeping it going indefinitely. I’ll probably just watch what I want then cancel it again.

I thought they were going to be different from networks and at least give me closure on their shows, but Sense 8 season 2 had a massive cliffhanger and now we’ll never know what happened. The Wachowskis told them from the beginning that they planned on five seasons, they knew that it was going to be a large cast and filmed all over the world. None of this was news and yet Netflix decided not to continue.

I understand that they weren’t getting the kind of viewer numbers they expected, but that’s the beauty of the Netflix model, the show is going nowhere. It will always be there for people to discover and love, only now they will find it and be let down. It will be the next Firefly, a vocal fanbase that feels forever slighted. If we could only get a movie to wrap it up that might make things better.

I don’t normally write stuff like this, I write reviews, but it bothered me so much I felt like I had to share something. For now, I’m going to wrap up watching the few things in my Netflix queue that aren’t available anywhere else, and then probably end up buying more seasons of things on Amazon. Because, honestly, fuck you Netflix.

***UPDATE***

Clearly my post has worked, lol, Netflix is going to let them create a two hour movie. I know it’s not going to have everything I want, but hopefully it’s enough. Yeah!

Conspiracy Theory (1997)

conspiracy-theory

Conspiracy Theory (1997)

Director:

Richard Donner

Starring:

Mel Gibson

Julia Roberts

Patrick Stewart

Plot:

A man obsessed with conspiracy theories becomes a target after one of his theories turns out to be true. Unfortunately, in order to save himself, he has to figure out which theory it is.

Review:

This is one of my favorite movies. It has slow parts and the story could be tighter, but I still watch it any chance I get.

Mel Gibson plays a great crazy man and Julia Roberts plays a nice normal lawyer with the Justice Department.

Patrick Stewart gets his nose bitten off too, which is always fun.

This movie would be a lot less interesting set during our internet age. It’s too easy to get your personal conspiracy theories out there and all the effort he goes through is fun to watch.

His apartment is one of my favorite parts cause it’s just so freaky and paranoid. All the little quirks are fun and the fact that Julia just goes with it is fun.

4.5/5

Star Trek Beyond (2016)

star-trek-beyond

Star Trek Beyond (2016)

Director:

Justin Lin

Starring:

Chris Pine

Zacchary Quinto

Karl Urban

Simon Pegg

Plot:

The USS Enterprise crew explores the furthest reaches of uncharted space, where they encounter a new ruthless enemy who puts them and everything the Federation stands for to the test.

Review:

Of the three movies I rented from Red Box during a particularly ambitious visit this was my favorite. That’s not saying too much though since I chose some eh movies.

If you want a Sci-Fi action movie than this has got you covered. There are alien planets, fighting in space, fighting with ships, a massive city in space, a roguish captain, basically everything you need for a space opera. It’s like they had a check list of typical Space Opera tropes and checked all the boxes, which is fine and right now there isn’t much of that out there in movie form.

If you’re looking for a Star Trek movie focused on diplomacy and science, basically The Next Generation, then there’s isn’t nearly as much for you. There’s almost a sort of nod to that at the very beginning as though the writers were saying if they did that it would be boring and not worth watching. Whatever. To each their own.

I like the new Star Trek movies as long as I don’t think about the Star Trek series/episodes that I love. If I go into it thinking Sci-Fi Action I enjoy the movies a lot better, it’s only after when I start to think about it that the movies start to bug me and that’s only because they make me feel like I’m never going to get a movie like what I loved.

3.5/5