Nicole Kidman

Aquaman (2018)

Aquaman

Aquaman (2018)

Director:

James Wan

Starring:

Jason Momoa

Amber Heard

Nicole Kidman

Dolph Lundgren

Plot:

Arthur Curry, the human-born heir to the underwater kingdom of Atlantis, goes on a quest to prevent a war between the worlds of ocean and land.

Review:

I went in with no expectations for this movie. I’d only watched one trailer, that I didn’t really remember, but I had several people tell me this and Wonder Woman were signaling DC finally coming into their own. I don’t know what the hell movie they were watching but I personally felt that Aquaman was hot garbage.

How many times did something explode into people interrupting a moment? Like four times! How many times did a guitar riff play when Aquaman said some one line? I think another four times, in like the first half hour. The CG hair was super distracting, especially on Dolph Lundgren. The movie was way too long. The plot boring and super, super predictable but not in a fun way. There was nothing fun about this movie.

Maybe if you’re a huge Aquaman fan you enjoyed how close to the comics the villains costumes supposedly were. I’ve never read an Aquaman comic so I couldn’t take Manta Ray seriously. And every time they said Ocean Master I snorted.

I just…I can’t with DC. After watching Captain Marvel and Into the Spiderverse it’s like they aren’t anywhere in the same league and I can’t help but compare them. Marvel has had a plan since day one and it freaking shows. The DC universe makes the X-Men universe look simple. I just don’t know what the fuck was going on in the greater world and universe and honestly I don’t care.

I wasn’t invested in any of the relationships in this movie which made the over two hour movie drag into eternity. There was no chemistry between any of the actors, though Nicole Kidman, god love her, tried. I just couldn’t with anyone here and have no idea what the fuck people were raving about with this movie.

1/5

Re-Watch: The Stepford Wives (2004)

Stepford Wives

The Stepford Wives (2004)

Director:

Frank Oz

Starring:

Nicole Kidman

Bette Midler

Matthew Broderick

Roger Bart

Plot:

What does it take to become a Stepford wife, a woman perfect beyond belief? Ask the Stepford husbands, who’ve created this high-tech terrifying little town, in a very modern comedy-thriller.

Review:

There are plot holes in this movie. They refer to the wives as robots and machines, yet all Walter had to do was override their programming and they were back to themselves. That makes me think they were just controlled by the chips, but if that’s the case then how was that one an ATM? Or how did that other throw sparks? See plot holes.

I don’t care. I still enjoy it. The women are over exaggerated personalities, both before and after the change. You’ve got these women that are 110% focused on their career and then that focus and intensity is switched to their homes and family. Honestly I think it’s funny, but I’m probably weird.

As long as I’m being honest, there’s a part of me that would like to be a Stepford wife. I’d love to cook and clean and take care of my husband and be happy with only that. Instead I want to spend time watching movies, reading, and writing. As well as all that other stuff. There are just too many things that I want to do for my house to ever be that clean or meals to always be prepared from scratch.

So I watch this movie and it shows that extremes are probably not a good idea. I don’t want to be a career obsessed bitch or a Betty Homemaker. I will settle for somewhere in between.

4/5